Relationships are one of the most intimate, rewarding, complicated, and frustrating aspects of life. The old saying about other people is true: “We can’t live with them, and we can’t live without them.” Whether the relationship is with a father, a mother, a husband, a daughter, a friend, a co-worker, and on and on, we long for life-giving, fulfilling connections.
Yet for many, disappointing and unfulfilled relationships are the deepest wounds they carry within them. And these wounds from the past often lead to actions and reactions that affect relationships in the present.
With regard to how a person engages relationships, most people are either Enmeshed or Distant. And it only makes sense. Because, either we want relationships so much and are so desperate for it that we become enmeshed with(in) another person. Or, we are so scared of the intimacy and conflict that arises by being with someone, that we distance and isolate ourselves from true contact and connection with another person. Relationship counseling is a place where you can learn to navigate the middle ground.
Relational difficulty often manifests as:
- Yelling, screaming, commanding, demanding
- Repeating the same conversations over and over
- Resentment, bitterness, unforgiveness
- Belittling, contempt, relentless sarcasm
- Sexual frustration
How we act in our current relationships provides the context for understanding our history, our current reality, and the hope of a transformed future. Through relationship counseling, we will engage the struggles in your relationships in order to dis-empower frustrating ways of relating. We will seek to re-route and re-channel miss-spent energy into transformed way of relating that result in life-giving connection.
As a relationships counselor, I work from interpersonal, existential, and psychodynamic perspectives which promote relational responsibility and prosperity. In relationship counseling, my goal for you is a thriving, abundant, connected life where you can feel the joy and peace that being with other people can bring.